a feeling that is not stress, or overwhelm, or tiredness, but maybe heck-care, got-a-lot-of-stuff-to-do-but-don't-feel-like-doing kind of feeling... so every day i'm complaining that i'm so busy busy, while i slack most of my free time away. Well, not slack, but not doing anything productive either. Jialing says that i should start doing work in the evenings, but just don't feel like doing anything after dinner.. That's just me..

I think I'm ultra irritating. That's why got nobody around me except for the as people. Sat at the wrong place today during civics breakfast, got labelled as mei you gong de xin.. oops, sorry ee sang. Then think I talk too much, disturb people around me... So obvious that hk had so much less fun doing physics prac with me instead of xh behind him. Haiz.. What else? Oh yeah, cannot forget this.. Today Christelle wanted to borrow an integration assignment to can kao, then bao gave her mine and she rejected it immediately!! Aaargh, nobody wants my tutorials any more! They think it's too abstract, too many skipped steps.. Aargh! and eve was just happily laughing away. Hahaha while I was protesting and trying to clear myself.

Anyway, bao and xh and christine think that I'm super AP, though I don't see what I've done that's different from the rest of the term.. OK, I haven't been very nice to evryone, and I know that. I told myself that it's because this is a truly hectic term, but I know that's just a dumb excuse.

Really worried about the ireland trip, or rather, the europe trip. It's in a month's time. I'm totally unprepared. The band act like we've got all the time in the world. With my overflowing schedule, I doubt I can even spare the time to prepare anything at all for the trip. Was just telling everyone that I won't have time to study for chem test next week, won't have time to finish tutorials, and it will be a disaster if my name is listed for maths s next week. Gosh, I'm in a mess.