feeling helpless.. throughout the day, have been thinking of how to help myself, no soln yet. The last time I was this helpless was, let me see, Sec 4? beginning of last yr? Can't remember, but it was a period of time where I write HELP! in all my notes. Think I might start doing that again.

I want to improve, in all areas, but don't know how. Nothing's working. So what if i practise every day? I still can't make a decent melody line. Want to improve GP, but how? Do more? Write more? Read more? Where to find the time? Sometimes I wish I would just stop trying to do everything, wish I have the time luxury like I do in "sectionals", where I can prac everything I need to prac and still have time to slack. About next year, that's such a huge problem, what do I want to study? I don't know. Where do I want to go? I don't know. What do I want to do? I have no idea either. How? help.. Sometimes wish I would just open my stupid mouth and ask..

RJ is a good sch. It has a lot of resources for us. The library, for example, has every reference we'll probably need, except for GP, I think. But I don't use it, rather go online to search. Teachers are just sitting there most of time waiting for us to approach, but I don't do that too.. what a waste.. haiz